A letter from (the I am) your other you
What are you looking for? When you’re reading the news, scrolling down social media posts for hours, watching Netflix, studying, working, video calling, browsing and staying “connected” to others behind doors? What are you craving for?
What do you really want to fulfill? To go back to “normal”, to leave your home and get distracted again with those fantastic social connections and to enjoy “freedom” without being truly present? Maybe to gather experience from this weird society (and planet) even if you lose yourself in the process?
Why are you so afraid of living with yourself for more than a couple of hours a day? I know it’s scary to confront your emotional baggage in that “confine” space you are in. I know there’s anxiety and fear, of not being enough, of wanting to achieve more and not being sure where you are going or why you are even here (on earth) in the first place…
It’s all part of the same challenge of finding your own unique purpose. But somehow, even in physical solitude, you get distracted again, you receive that call, reply that email, wash the dishes, walk the dog, mind your kids and so on… You get caught into the daily routine again, while I wait patiently for you, and you continue your day with a shadow of uncertainty that you cover up by reading the news or doing something else to prevent you from facing your demons and your true-self.
Who are you? Who am I? Who are we? Are we 1 and the same?
I take a deep breath contemplating these questions, all the clouds in my mind move slowly… I don’t know what I really am, but it’s ok to contemplate the “non-being” or the “unknown” state beyond my mental projections and social tags. Somehow, that brings me back to my true essence, to the I am that I can’t explain with other verbs, I could only say perhaps: I am you or we are 1.
I continue taking deep inhalations and exhalations through the nose, observing the spaces between each cycle of the breath, feeling the beating of my heart, and only then I can truly let go for at least a few seconds. Let go of what? of the false me… However, I acknowledge that “false me” is essential for what I am in this plane of existence. I need to take care of her, with all her shadows and light, her confusion and human wisdom.
When I let myself observe and become truly aware, then she becomes one with me and I become one with her, just for the limited time this vehicle has been assigned to me, and for each cycle of the breath she allows me to be present.
Please come back to me as often as you can, you know I am only a mindful breath away from you.
Your other you, you know who I am.